"During this initial transition, the partner who is feeling “demoted” often reports experiencing sadness, betrayal, distrust, a sense of loss and grieving, fears of abandonment. The partner often makes the situation worse by denying that there is any loss, ridiculing or dismissing their partner's fears, and stressing that this new development will enhance the primary relationship. While this is sincere and is intended to reassure the partner that they have nothing to fear and that the primary relationship is not in jeopardy, it is bound to backfire by making the partner feel invalidated. Instead, it is important to acknowledge that their partner has lost something: they have lost the primacy of being the one and only lover, and they need to grieve that loss even though in the long run the new relationship may have an overall positive effect on the primary relationship which may outweigh that loss."